Exactly a year ago today we hit The Bottom. And we’re still crawling back up. And it’s a long haul. I’ve already talked about how it happened, already discussed my reasons for being open, and how I’m doing and what we learned. It’s kind of all been said already. All I want to say today [...]
Some years pass quietly, washing gently over you, the turning of the calendar pages the only indication that time is passing at all. Of course things change, but they’re little things. Maybe you have a new favorite pair of shoes, or you’ve fallen in with a new circle of friends, or your body is a [...]
This blog has been seriously and sorely lacking my attention and tender, loving care. The reason that this blog has been seriously and sorely lacking my attention and tender, loving care solely boils down to the fact that I had nothing of interest to say. I try not to blog when I don’t have anything [...]
We know now that a positive home pregnancy test doesn’t necessarily mean you’re having a baby in nine months. We know now that loss finds you in unexpected ways. We know now what D&C stands for. And what it’s like. We know now that there’s nothing pretty or insignificant about miscarriage. We know now that [...]
I had a dream last night that I was still pregnant. At times, I wasn’t sure if I had just gotten pregnant or if I was still pregnant from before the miscarriage. If somehow the D&C didn’t take or missed something and I had a little survivor baby inside of me. So ridiculous but that [...]
Hardly am I looking for sympathy. Sympathy makes me cry, even though it means the world. But I don’t need it to move on. Hardly am I looking to become a voice on being open about miscarriage. Open felt right for me. Open is not right for everyone. I’m writing about my miscarriage because writing [...]
Universal experiences are strange things. They are fraught with do’s and don’t’s and are usually marred by other people’s opinions and experiences. When I was engaged, what I most struggled with was balancing what I thought I was supposed to be feeling (joy! elation! smiling all the time!) with what I was really feeling (stress! [...]
I’ll hit the bottom Hit the bottom and escape Escape I’ll hit the bottom Hit the bottom and escape Escape -Radiohead, Weird Fishes/Arpeggi There isn’t really much to say. I’m sure you’ll find too that your tongue is tied. Three weeks ago, we found out I was pregnant. We experienced that whole range of emotions [...]
